You Too Sir, Could Be Mr. Amagansett

The third annual Mr. Amagansett Pageant is taking place on February 25 at the Stephen Talkhouse and a lot of men are getting ready to participate in one of the fiercest competitions that takes place in the Hamptons.

The Mr. Amagansett Pageant is a benefit to support the Donald T. Sharkey Memorial Community Fund which provides scholarship opportunities for local students, funds for local fire departments and the Wounded Warrior Project. Don Sharkey was a beloved building inspector for the town who died unexpectedly at the age of 46.

The event is essentially an all-male beauty pageant judged by a panel that is exclusively female. Last year, Amagansett Talkhouse owner Peter Honerkamp was going to win the prestigious title of Mr. Amagansett, but was reportedly disqualified for—some said—“trying to bribe the judges.”

The winning title went to Ken Wessberg, who was representing the East Hampton Town Fire Department. The winner of the event is hailed by wearing a white robe with an “A” sewn on the back, a king’s crown and a ceremonial dance. During the 2011 competition, Nick Kraus, the well-known Stephen Talkhouse manager, made a professional film that included quotes from Town Supervisor Bill Wilkinson explaining to Kraus that Amagansett is not its own Town, but a hamlet of East Hampton.

It’s all for a lot of fun, and a lot of fun it is. Honerkamp explained to me over the telephone that he will be doing another movie of this year’s competition.

“The routines are different each year,” Peter said. “Sometimes guys tell jokes, sometimes they take off shirts, we never really know. Nick and I each do a movie, my take is going to be ‘The Most Interesting Man in the World’ video this year and I know Nick is doing a movie that will undoubtedly attack me. A lot of women come to the event and it is pretty hilarious, and it’s all for charity. It’s all really ridiculous but it’s a lot of fun.”

When we heard about the Mr. Amagansett competition at the Dan’s Papers offices, we all discussed what it would take to earn such a prestigious title. After a little bit of brainstorming, we have come up with some advice for potential candidates in the pageant who are looking to earn the title of “Mr. Amagansett.” 

Don’t try to win over the judges by displaying your uncanny ability at solving difficult mathematical problems on a chalkboard.

If you have a beer belly, don’t fight it, embrace it.

If you are planning on doing a film for your entry, don’t even bother, Nick and Peter have that on lock down.

Don’t attempt to dance to impress the judges if you can, in fact, dance.

If you are going to tell jokes during the judging process, avoid telling clean jokes.

If you consider drinking a skill, you have come to the right beauty pageant.

If you are from an area that is outside of the Hamptons, you better be really, really, ridiculously good looking.

Do flirt with the judges, however do not make out with them.

If you are going to make a film about yourself, make sure that your name is either Peter Honerkamp or Nick Krauss. 

Nobody is impressed that you can drink a beer in five seconds. Everybody in Amagansett who lives there in February can do that.

Any talent performed in your underwear increases points. This is especially true if you are wearing tighty whities.

Good luck to the competitors!

 

Third Annual Mr. Amagansett Pageant, Saturday, February 25, Stephen Talkhouse, Amagansett, 516-458-3978, www.donsharkeyfund.org. $20.

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