| Issue #27, September 29, 2006 |
Inspirations by Emily J Weitz
Time and Space in the Working World
There was a brief time when I worked in corporate America, and the thing that irritated me most was the amount of time I spent pouring my soul into the heartless abyss of my computer, my moments stolen away without a trace. I couldn’t bear watching the hours tick by knowing that I could accomplish my work in a fraction of the time, but my physical presence was the true demand of the job. There was a time when my MySpace account was up-to-date, when my e-mails were read and returned each day, when I knew how much was left in my checking account. I was a Corporate American, waiting out my days, in cyberspace. It felt so empty, so meaningless, so dry.
I left that world in a cloud of virtual dust to plunge into one of the largest bureaucracies on Earth: the New York City Public Schools. I wanted something real. I wanted something hands-on. I wanted something that wouldn’t suck time out of my veins and leave me with nothing but a decent relationship with the guys at MoveOn.org.
You should see how many e-mails I have in my Inbox now.
I used to feel like what I was doing lacked any substance. Now, my life is bursting with so much meaning that there is no space for myself. As soon as I stepped into the lives of 26 ten-year-olds with their eyes on me (ideally), I have put myself on the back burner. I have not been bored since the day I walked into that giant brick cube of a school in the heart of Harlem. Now the question morphs from “How do I add substance to a task that feels devoid of meaning?” to “How do I create space when everything seems so important?”
I have good days and bad days. But the good days invariably have one thing in common, and this is the bit of wisdom I hope to impart to you: learn to create space in your jam-packed days. When I leave my students on a good day, I may have taught them as much or as little content as I taught them on a bad day. However, I leave them with a feeling of space and time. They had time to copy their homework so they could do it well. They had time to do their classroom jobs without pushing. They had time to line up the way they’re supposed to line up. Because I created space in our day, I wasn’t dictated by bells and deadlines, but guided by patience and coolness. It’s not an easy task, but it makes life so much sweeter. Because a moment is as long as you manage to savor it.
I used to watch minutes pile on top of one another without occasion. I used to feel the burden of too much time before that five o’clock bell rang. And with that burden I luxuriated in a great deal of space. Minutes to wander to the bathroom; hours to elongate my lunch. Now, I have exactly 37 minutes for lunch, and being late is not an option. So recapturing some of that lost space without compromising all of that newly gained meaning is the goal.
All it takes is a deep breath. All it takes is a healthy mix of planning and spontanaeity. The next time you are swimming in the things you have to do before the world explodes with a giant “BOOM,” give yourself a minute to take space. It only takes a minute. Push your body back from your desk, from your stacks of grade books or drawings, standardized tests or No Child Left Behind (ha!) demands.
Look away from the clock and look into yourself. There is space in there, somewhere underneath the hardening stress deposits in your shoulders. Find that space and breathe deeply. Feel it grow.
 |
