| Issue #35, November 24, 2006 |
Police Blotter
Shotgun? No, That’s Just A Deer
A resident on Shelter Island reported to police that while putting garbage
out on the deck, a sound from the woods, resembling a shotgun, resonated.
The police showed up and investigated the sound and found several deer
in the woods, but no hunters. The police mentioned in the report that
the deer may have made the sound by walking on debris. However, no one
is suggesting the obvious – deer are now packing heat.
* * *
Leaf Blower Tussle
A resident in East Hampton was leaf-blowing her property when she got
into an argument with her neighbor. The neighbor wanted her to stop
blowing the leaves out into the street, and took a picture of her. After
the picture was taken, she called police. No word on whether or not
the picture was a keeper.
* * *
That’s Weird
Police were called when a Sag Harbor man reported that somebody had
entered his house, removed a Toshiba television and placed it in the
front yard. Police have examined the television for fingerprints, and
for any decent football games that might be playing.
* * *
Bicycle Recovery
An electric bicycle reported stolen by a 50-year-old man in Greenport
was recovered last week by police. The bicycle was found in the possession
of a 30-year-old man, who was charged with fifth-degree criminal possession
of stolen property and petty larceny. The 50-year-old man now has his
electric bicycle back, and can hit the pavement on the road of justice.
* * *
Chicken and Duck Attack
A resident in Riverhead reported to police that his pet chicken and
duck were attacked by a dog. The dog’s owner was issued a summons
for not controlling the animal. Both the chicken and the duck were sent
to the animal hospital in Mattituck on the North Fork and are doing
okay. The chicken did not comment, but the duck did mention, “quack,
quack,” and insulted the dog that attacked him. His comments were
too obscene to be published.
* * *
Soccer Goal Stolen
A soccer goal from the Hampton Bays Elementary School was reported stolen
by the Hampton Bays Youth Soccer Organization. How? Why? Such weird
stuff this week.
* * *
Arsenal
A man in Southampton was arrested by police after he was identified
as the person who had entered a Southampton home and removed several
rifles, shotguns and swords from the home. Luckily, for the police,
he went quietly.
* * *
Stranded Kayaker
Police in Shelter Island responded to a kayaker who was stranded in
the middle of the harbor in cold-weather conditions. The kayaker ended
up being okay and was helped ashore by police. After he warmed up, police
advised him not to “go up the creek without a paddle” anymore.
–Written and Compiled By David Lion Rattiner
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