Hamptons Police Blotter: An Olive Oil Scam Is Uncovered

Only in the Hamptons does an olive oil scam take place along with McGumbus losing his sarong at the beach. Unbelievable.

A New Vintage
A man on the North Fork was arrested after he was found to be in possession of both PCP and marijuana, as well as a scale and large quantities of cash. The man told officers that he was in the wine business.

Chairs
A man in Noyac called police to report that somebody had stolen two Adirondack chairs from his home when he was away. He estimates the chairs to be worth approximately $500. Police think this incident may be in connection with other recent activity of the Adirondack Chair syndicated crime ring.

Olive Oil Scam
A man on the North Fork was caught selling olive oil that he said was homemade, but was allegedly store-bought oil that he simply poured into a new glass bottle and labeled with a sticker touting it as homemade. The olive oil scheme was uncovered when a woman who buys olive oil from the man saw him purchasing the store-bought goods in large quantities at the supermarket. Some bottles of the “homemade” olive oil were sold for more than $60. The man stands by his claim that his olive oil is “homemade,” since he pours the oil into the bottles at home.

Shelter Island
During his morning Tai Chi routine on the beach, Old Man McGumbus, 103-year-old former World War II flame-thrower commander and United Stated Armed Forces coed mixed martial arts champion was arrested for public nudity after his sarong blew off in the strong winds experienced on Shelter Island last week. McGumbus claims that he was meditating when it happened and had absolutely no idea that he was naked. His sarong was later recovered and he was released.

Not Model Behavior
A man with a prior record was arrested again after he was caught secretly taping models at a fashion show in Southampton. The man was hired to cover the show as a freelance photographer, then set up a camera without anyone’s knowledge, to film the models while they were changing during the show.

Hamptons Drive-By
A man was arrested in Southampton after he was caught shooting paintballs at businesses while driving by in his car. The shooter was apprehended after one of the business owners reported the vehicle and the driver/shooter was found to have a stash of loaded paintball guns in his car.