Heather McDonald Talks Dirty at Bay Street July 7

Bay Street Theater’s summer Comedy Club will present Heather McDonald on Monday, July 7. The wacky, bold comedienne, best known for her appearances on E!’s Chelsea Lately and After Lately, is also an author, with her books You’ll Never Blue Ball in This Town Again and My Inappropriate Life both bestsellers. I spoke with McDonald about her outrageous stand-up act, her upcoming projects, her kids, and more.

Have you been to the Hamptons before?

I’ve never been to the Hamptons. I was supposed to go many years ago, but I did a pilot [that got picked up] so I never went! I do have some rich friends there though. It’s always good to have rich friends. I like to think I benefit from that!

You released My Inappropriate Life last year. What are some reactions you get from readers?

“Is Heather McDonald getting a divorce?” That was kind of exciting! I’m not getting a divorce, but I do say so much stuff about my husband in my books. A lot of people say, “How does your husband feel? Do you let your kids read these books?” No, but I wrote both books knowing they would read it eventually. If they saw it now, they might be a little weirded out.

How much exposure to your comedy have your kids had?

They’ve seen some sketches and stuff. Sometimes they see the roundtable [on Chelsea Lately]. I pretty much stopped letting them see it. I don’t want them to exposed to some of the [material], the anal sex talk, but that’s life and it gives them some character.

My son was doing a talent show and I said, “Why don’t you do some standup?” and at the end of his act he said, “Thanks a lot ladies and gentleman although I mostly mean ladies!” And then one time… My husband snores, and my Christmas gift was that he was going to go in and get that corrective operation. So my son asks him what life insurance is and why it’s required for the surgery. So he explains it to him, and my son goes, “But you know what? It’d be better if mom died. Because yours is only $500,000 and mom’s is $1 million.” They’re very funny. I tweet what they say sometimes, but sometimes they’re like, “Don’t tweet that!” They’re both funny in their own way.

Are you sad about Chelsea Lately and After Lately ending?

It’s been so great. I got the job in June, 2007 and it was a 13-week commitment, so when they officially announced that we were done, I said to myself, “Who am I to complain for having a 13-week job last 7 years and 13 weeks? [Chelsea Handler] just doesn’t want to do it anymore. It’s weird and it’s sad; it’s like your senior year of college. I’ve had several experiences that end like this. I did the Groundlings for many years and that ended. So I know that this is going to end too. So that part of it is sad. If [Handler] would’ve signed up for three more years, I would have totally done it. It’s a great job. I know how to do it, it’s a 20-minute commute and I like being recognized.

Your friends, the Kardashians, are also in the Hamptons this summer.

That’s great! I know them really well, so I’m totally going to email Khloé and be like, “What’s up?” I’m coming in on July 4, and I’d like to see them.

What do you think about the mixed reactions the Kardashians seem to elicit from the public?

Sometimes it’s just amazing. My friend co-manages Kendall and Kylie and helped write their book [Rebels: City of Indra: The Story of Lex and Livia]. It’s this really cool young adult sci-fi book and I read it. I thought it was great! But the amount of horrible tweets is just….

Yes, they get like 8 million tweets directed at them, but all these people posting these bad reviews on Amazon? Those reviews showed up the day the book came out! It’s amazing that it’s so polarizing!

It is what it is.

Heather McDonald performs at Bay Street Theater in Sag Harbor on Monday, July 7, at 8 p.m. For tickets ($69.50) and more information, go to baystreet.org.