The 25 Best Modern Seinfeld Tweets
In observance of the 25th anniversary of Seinfeld, the classic sitcom from East Hampton’s Jerry Seinfeld, we run down the 25 best tweets by the popular Twitter account @SeinfeldToday, which imagines what Jerry, George Kramer and Elaine would be up to today.
Jerry’s gf dumps him for not wishing her happy bday on Facebook. J:”I said it to her face!” E:”But her friends can’t see that &get jealous.”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) May 14, 2014
Jerry gets paranoid about his girlfriend’s past when her iPhone automatically connects to the wi-fi at Newman’s apartment.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) June 3, 2014
George is too scared to break up with his intimidating girlfriend so he just repeatedly responds to her texts with “New phone. Who’s this?”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) May 19, 2014
Jerry’s GF always smokes an e-cig in bed. GF:”But it’s vapor.” J:”You say that like vapor’s something I want. I don’t want vapor! No vapor!”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) April 16, 2014
Jerry’s girlfriend won’t stop saying that she “literally can’t.” “What?! Can’t what?! Finish your sentence!”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) March 18, 2014
When Jerry’s GF says he’s no fun, he starts using emojis constantly. She dumps him. J:”I was being fun!” E:”Emoji guy is not fun. He’s sad.”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) June 24, 2014
When a website claims Jerry is dead, he’s annoyed people aren’t more upset. It turns out Newman runs a website that spreads death hoaxes.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) March 16, 2014
Jerry goes on the Tonight Show but pisses Fallon off when he refuses to play any games. G:”Him? I didn’t know he got mad.” J:“Well he does!”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) March 13, 2014
When George’s ex changes her HBOGo password, George tries to reconcile with her just long enough to get the new one.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) March 10, 2014
George promises not to watch House Of Cards without his GF but can’t help himself. She dumps him when he badly pretends to be surprised.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) February 27, 2014
Jerry gets stuck on a never-ending group text. “You used to be able to avoid people! Now they can choose to live in your pocket forever!”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) February 24, 2014
George’s GF refuses to tag herself on Facebook in any photos with George. G:“It’s like she’s hiding something, Jerry!” J:”She is. You.”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) February 18, 2014
Jerry’s girlfriend dumps him for inadequately tipping a delivery guy during a blizzard but it’s so cold she won’t leave his apartment.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) January 21, 2014
Kramer hosts a “non-recorded” podcast. K:”It’s just like a podcast, but no microphones.” J:”So a conversation?” K:”You don’t get it Jerry!”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) January 9, 2014
George swipes right for every woman on Tinder. E:”What if you’re not attracted to her?” G:”If she’s attracted to me, I might be!”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) December 21, 2013
Jerry’s Twitter’s hacked. People like “Hacked Jerry” better. George tries to get trampled on Black Friday so he can sue. Everyone is polite.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) November 30, 2013
Elaine’s bf constantly starts texts but never sends them. E:”If I get the bubble w/ three dots I want a text!” J:”The bubble’s not binding!”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) October 25, 2013
George takes a date to see Gravity, but sits on his 3D glasses. The theater refuses to give him another pair and his date refuses to leave.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) October 19, 2013
Jerry & George discover Kramer’s the subject of an insane number of Craigslist missed connections. Elaine gets a pixie cut. It’s disastrous.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) August 8, 2013
Kramer is addicted to Candy Crush, but suspects one of the levels is impossible to beat. “They’re modern day carnies, Jerry! It’s a con!”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) July 28, 2013
Elaine suspects her bf is gay when he’s mysteriously busy during pride weekend. Kramer helps her investigate, ends up leading the parade.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) June 30, 2013
Jerry discovers his gf still uses her JDate profile. Kramer leaves messages for the NSA in his emails. Newman reluctantly tries SoulCycle.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) June 11, 2013
George tries to hide that despite seeing every episode he has no idea what’s happening on Game of Thrones. Elaine buys defective yoga pants.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) May 21, 2013
Elaine’s bf is a “downgrader.” “I call, he texts me back. I text, he emails. I’m scared if I email, I’ll have to look for smoke signals.”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) April 29, 2013
George thinks his GF is faking a gluten-intolerance, feeds her real cookies, sending her to the ER. Autocorrect ruins Jerry’s relationship.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) December 10, 2012
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