Coin Toss: The Bachelor Episode 7 or SNL 40th?

I’m in a quandary! What’s a person to do? NBC is airing the SNL 40^th Anniversary Celebration show, bringing back all the alums, on Sunday night from 8-11 p.m. But ABC’s The Bachelor, Season 19, “Chris Tells All,” followed by Episode 7, is on opposite the SNL special—not fair to this fan of both!

OK, I know what I’m going to do. I’ll spend the next 3 hours flipping back and forth. Here goes…

SNL opens with Jimmy Fallon and Justin Timberlake doing a song and dance routine on the funny words and phrases that have become synonymous with SNL—a cute way to start. Steve Martin walks down the center stage stairs as the host, but not so fast, there are others who try to steal the spotlight from Steve, telling him they are more qualified to host. Enter Tom Hanks, Alec Baldwin, Melissa McCarthy, Chris Rock, Payton Manning, Miley Cyrus, Billy Crystal, Paul McCartney and Paul Simon.

That was a fun kickoff to the festivities. Some old clips of funny bits—I had forgotten how talented John Belushi was. Paul McCartney sings “Maybe I’m Amazed.” Paul, you could sing names right out of the phone book and I would love it. Next, Jack Nicolson introduces 40 years of political humor. Yes! That’s the bread and butter for SNL, as far as I’m concerned.

FLIP TO THE BACHELOR. Andy Dorfman is sobbing uncontrollably. She was the bachelorette from last season. She picked former baseball player Josh Murray, but they broke up. Andy, let it go. Look, you’ve got it all: gorgeous, smart, a professional career. So, Mr. Right turned into Mr. Wrong. Your real Mr. Right is just around the corner. Keep the faith, girl.

Episode 7 begins with host Chris Harrison announcing to the girls that they will be going on a trip to Des Moines, Iowa to be close to bachelor Chris Souless’ hometown of Arlington. The girls bubble over with excitement. Come now, producers of The Bachelor, where are all the exotic destinations? So far we went from Deadwood to Des Moines—I want Paris!

Lucky Jade gets the first one-on-one date with Chris. An aside from Jade, “Arlington feels like a little ghost town.” Yep, this girl is going to be real happy down on the farm. Chris takes Jade to his high school where a football game is happening. It seems that the entire town, of some 400 people, is at the game. That’s why Jade got the ghost town impression.

Meanwhile back at the hotel, Becca, Carly, Britt and Kaitlyn decide to take the three-hour tour from Des Moines to Arlington to quench their curiosity about the place where one of them might wind up spending the rest of her life. They pass miles of corn fields and finally get to Main Street in Arlington. Reality sets in and Britt says, “It takes about two minutes to walk through this town.”

I empathize. That’s exactly how I felt when we drove down Main Street on Shelter Island. If the girls sneezed, they would miss Main Street in Arlington. I think I did sneeze when we drove down Main Street on Shelter Island. I couldn’t believe I missed the entire town, so I asked my husband to turn around and drive down the street again. As it turned out, I didn’t miss a thing.

The girls ask the only person they see to recommend a good place to eat. He says, “Not in Arlington.” They ask, “What do people do in Arlington?” He responds, “Go some place else.” It seems he was being perfectly honest. It turns out he’s the town pastor. Britt confesses to the other girls that she doesn’t see herself living in this town.

FLIP back to SNL

Celebrity Jeopardy with Will Ferrell doing his impersonation of Alex Trebek. On the panel are Sean Connery (Darrell Hammond), Burt Reynolds (Norm Macdonald), Justin Bieber (Kate McKinnon), Jim Carrey (Mathew McConaughey). Keenan Thompson does a Daily Double stint as Bill Cosby mixing up a cocktail (very edgy).

FLIP to The Bachelor

Whitney gets the one-on-one with Chris. They decide to take selfies of the time they are sharing together. She says that someday they will share the pictures with their children-sweet sentiment, but presumptuous, too.

FLIP to SNL

“Weekend Update” with anchors Tina Fey, Amy Poehler and the incomparable Jane Curtin. Emma Stone does a cameo as Gilda Radner doing Roseanne Roseannadanna. Melissa McCarthy does her best impression of Chris Farley’s Matt Foley and crashes the update desk in half, Edward Norton does Stefon and is joined by Bill Hader who gives tips on how to do the character. This was a funny bit.

FLIP to The Bachelor

Chris goes on an ice-skating group date with Becca, Britt, Carly and Kaitlyn. Chris presents Kaitlyn with the hometown rose. That means he is serious about wanting to meet her family. Britt flips out when she sees Kaitlyn with the rose. She pressures Chris for validation and causes a very awkward scene. Carly says, “Wow! Looks like the Britt and Chris show has been canceled.”

Stay tuned for Episode 8, tonight at 8 p.m., to see if Carly is right.

FLIP to SNL

“Waynes World” with Mike Myers and Dana Carvey. They do the Top 10 list with a special thank you to Lorne Michaels and jokes addressed to Kanye West, telling him not to try to come up on the stage. They say, “I think Beck was one of the best, even better than Beyonce.” That was a good laugh.

For the finale, Paul Simon performs “Still Crazy After All These Years.” Yes, SNL, you are still crazy after 40 years, and may you continue to be crazy for at least another 40 years.

Barbara Anne Kirshner is the author of Madison Weatherbee-The Different Dachshund. She is a regular contributor to DansPapers.com.

Read more Guilty Pleasure Recaps of The Bachelor Season 19: Episode 4, Episode 5, Episode 6