Trump Tapes: Illegal Voters Lead to a Prosperous Nation

According to the tapes Donald Trump made of conversations in the White House, his new plan to find 3 million people who voted illegally (so he could say he won the popular vote) is really a plan to increase American employment numbers, thus proving his presidency is creating prosperity.

The commission to find the illegals is headed up by Vice President Pence. Since there are so few people who did vote for Hillary Clinton illegally, Trump intends to hire 3 million now-unemployed people to declare themselves as people who illegally voted for Clinton. Therefore, since these votes should not count and these people will have confessed, Trump will have been elected in 2016 by a majority of the voters and not just by the electoral college.

The bump in the employment rate as a result of these new hires in 2017 will be 1.5%. It will be another milestone in President Donald Trump’s program “my way or the highway,” which is now the secret slogan (listen to the tapes) upon which the Trump Administration is operating, replacing the earlier slogan “Make America Great Again.”

Remember you read this first in Dan’s Papers.

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